gnomi: (transportation_local)
gnomi ([personal profile] gnomi) wrote2006-09-05 10:38 am

Welcome to Boston, Students!

So, it's that time of year, when the students return (like swallows to Capistrano) to Boston. And thus it is time for yet another "[personal profile] gnomi explains it all" post. Not that any of the people this post is directed toward will actually see it, but it'll make me feel better.

1. You see that thing in front of you? It's a Really Big Street. Running across it while those fast-moving things (we call them "cars") are barrelling down at you will hurt you more than it will hurt the cars.

2. Moving trucks, while useful, should not completely block any of the following: driveways, sidewalks, crosswalks, intersections. We know you have to move your stuff. However, some of us have to live here, too.

3. Speaking of crosswalks, please learn how to use them. No, really. They're not there purely for the amusement of line painters.

4. Ah, the T. Yes, it's a subway system. Yes, it gets you and your obnoxious friends from place to place. But it is not solely yours. The other commuters might want to be able to, say, read their newspapers free of your loud, obscene comments at 7:15 in the morning. Or even at 5:30 at night.

5. Also, you see those big signs in the T stations that say "There is no smoking permitted on MBTA property?" Those do apply to you. And they apply regardless of what you're choosing to smoke. I'm just saying.

6. We know you're eager to get on the train. But you and your aforementioned obnoxious friends are just making it harder for everyone if you're blocking the door, keeping those of us in the train from getting out. This also applies to people blocking the doors when inside the train; if you move out of the doorway, people will be able to get off the train and you will get to your destination faster.

7. While we're talking trains and etiquette, let's tackle getting to and from those trains. You see the escalator? It comfortably accommodates two people per stair. But here's the deal. Stay to the right if you want to stand and let the moving stairs propel you upwards. Stay to the left if you wish to walk up the stairs. This is established local tradition, and there's no need for the commuters to have to slalom purely because you and your aforementioned obnoxious friends can't be bothered to notice all the people standing to the right of the stairs.

So, welcome to Boston. Keeping these things in mind will make your life much simpler and will also prevent me from thwacking you with my elbow as I strive to get to or from work.

Thank you,
The management.
gilana: (Default)

[personal profile] gilana 2006-09-05 02:54 pm (UTC)(link)
8. Simple physics. Two objects can not occupy the same space at the same time. And on the T, when it's a choice between your huge backpack or another human being, the human gets priority. Take your backpack off.

[identity profile] tanaise.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 03:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Re: 3.

Considering that cars stop for me better when I'm *not* in crosswalks, I feel that they exist to single out the weak.

[identity profile] tygerseye.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 03:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh #7. That used to make me crazy in NYC, too.

[identity profile] tiptoe39.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 03:51 pm (UTC)(link)
If I lived in Boston still, I would print this out and paste it to every lamppost and street sign from BU to Harvard.

[identity profile] fynixsoul.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 04:38 pm (UTC)(link)
You know, I'm a (very recently former) student, and I've lived in Boston my whole life. I never went to school in Boston, but still...I'm pretty convinced that every school within the city limits needs to hold a week-long course on "city etiquette".

Also: 9. Yes, we know you're happy to see each other again, but when congregating on the sidewalk, please keep your screaming, tearful reunions to under five minutes or under fifty decibles. Also, as a courtasy, please don't take up the ENTIRE sidewalk, forcing pedestrians to either burrow through you, or risk their necks to traffic darting around you.

[identity profile] stealthmuffin.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 05:04 pm (UTC)(link)
10. It's good that you make the effort to smell nice, especially when you're going to be crammed into a Green Line train for half an hour. However, dousing yourself in cheap men's cologne does not count as smelling nice.

And a corollary to #4: Yes, we can hear you if you talk on your cell phone. Many of us do not care that you got sooo wasted/have the worst roommate ever/don't know her name.
madfilkentist: Photo of Carl (Carl)

[personal profile] madfilkentist 2006-09-05 05:17 pm (UTC)(link)
3a. No, the crosswalks aren't there for the amusement of the line painters. They're there to be ignored by the maniac drivers.

Sub-corollary 4b: The person you're talking to on your cell phone can hear you even if you don't shout so loudly that everyone within 40 feet can hear you.

[identity profile] sokmunky.livejournal.com 2006-09-05 06:11 pm (UTC)(link)
I <3 you, gnomi. And your list.

s.