Beginning with the Basics

[gnomi]

This is the first in what I'm planning to be a series of posts about my religious beliefs and practices. I'm calling the series "Flying my Frumkeit." So, I'll start with some basics.

Things that are true about me:

-- I have always kept both kosher and Shabbat to some degree.

-- I've covered my hair since 1996 and haven't worn pants (in other words, worn only skirts) since 1995 or so, but I wear short sleeves (well, to my elbow) and sandals in the appropriate season (short as that season may be in the Boston area).

-- I prefer to daven where there's a mechitzah (a physical separation between men and women), and have since I was a teenager, but I can lein (recite with cantillation in front of the congregation) Torah and Haftarah, and I've taught others how to lein Haftarah.

-- I went to Orthodox day schools from Kindergarten through 12th grade, but I made a conscious decision to go to Israel with an unaffiliated Zionist organization instead of going to one of the girls' yeshivot that many of my classmates attended.

-- I often feel like I fall in between categories. I'm not really "frum from birth" ("FFB"), but neither am I a ba'alat teshuvah. I've been observant to some level my whole life; it's the exact level that's changed over time.

-- People frequently make mistaken assumptions about me/my life based on how I dress; sometimes I shock them by proving them wrong.

Comments

[dpolicar]

Amusingly, "cantillation" is the word I had to derive from context here.

[liminalia.livejournal.com]

Sandals are not modest enough? Sandals are mentioned in the Bible multiple times. I find this odd.

(Hi, directed here from cbpotts, but we've seen each other around. :) )

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Welcome! Make yourself at home and have a snack! ::points to the table of refreshments::

There's a viewpoint (which I don't hold) that showing one's toes if one is a woman is immodest/doesn't fit with the laws of modesty.

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

MS Word doesn't recognize it as a word; I had to double-check spelling with m-w.

[eireangus.livejournal.com]

Thanks for sharing those interesting facts about yourself, and I am definitely looking forward to reading more! Your last point also happens to me a lot.

Oh, by the way, the overdue e-mail is being sent this morning. I have some time here at work this morning.

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Hee. No rush on the e-mail; I completely understand work-work getting in the way of fun-work (after all, I'm a freelance editor (fun-work) on top of my full-time tech writing job (work-work)).

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

You could always wear socks with them...

(Have you heard of the mishegos allegedly going on in Bnei Brak right now?)

[530nm330hz.livejournal.com]

I have been told that the Rav ruled that a man wearing sandals without socks should not be asked to daven from the amud nor be given an aliyah.

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Socks defeat, in my mind, the point of wearing sandals instead of close-toed shoes.

And, no, I don't think I've heard about the B'nei Brak mishegos (unless the students won't *stop* with the "Rabbis, it's time for the morning shacharit" thing. ;-)).

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Interesting.

I wear sandals (shul sandals, but still sandals) almost every week in the spring-summer, once the weather gets nice, and I've noticed that many of the women at Kadimah do, as well. Of course, we don't have to worry about the whole davening-from-the-amud aspect of it.

[cbpotts.livejournal.com]

Is there a continuum of modesty, or is the concept sort of an absolute point (this is modest, this is not?)

(Naive question #2,356...)

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

They do, indeed. Also, socks and sandals look really *bad*. (I wear closed-toe shoes year round, but that's because of my bad feet. I'd love to wear sandals.)

Here's a synopsis, but in brief, there seems to be a group of Chareidi women in Israel, led by a Rabbanit Bruria Keren, who have decided that normal tzniut is not tznua enough. So they are wearing multiple skirts and capes to obscure their bodies, several scarves to make sure all their hair is covered, and many are wearing face coverings as well - some are even keeping their eyes covered to the point that, should they leave their homes, they must be led by a child.

It's being compared to wearing burkas, but burkas are actually less cumbersome.

They also do not speak to men other than their husbands, or look them in the eye. Rabbanit Bruria is on a "speech-fast" - she speaks four hours a week, when she talks to her followers.

I'm not sure this is real - it could be a prank pulled on or by the newspapers reporting it - but it is out there.

[cbpotts.livejournal.com]

What a fascinating link! It does seem like there's more than a small element of mental illness going on with the Rabbanit, (I hope I am using the term correctly), but one's left to wonder what's up with her followers?

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

There is, kind of, a continuum. There are people who fall along it at all sorts of places. There're guidelines of "this is modest, this is not," but the interpretation of those guidelines is where you get variation.

(does that make any sense?)

The pants-wearing/not-pants-wearing thing, for instance. The concept on which it's all based is the idea that women should not wear men's clothing. But in this day and age, where pants for women are designed specifically for women, do they qualify as "men's clothing"?

(This reminds me of one of my favorite "West Wing" quotes:

NANCY
It says the Secretary of Defense will be the principal assistant to the President on all matters relating to national security.

C.J.
And what does 'principal assistant' mean?

NANCY
It doesn't specify.

TOBY
Of course it wouldn't, 'cause that's an area of federal law where he'd want to have as much ambiguity as possible.)

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Oh, yikes.

Why does this seem like something rife with possibilities for the Chumra of the Month Club?

[eireangus.livejournal.com]

I just sent you a mini-novel. Hopefully you still want to be pals after you read my crazy biography! :-)

Be sure not to fly that frumkeit in a storm.

[half-double.livejournal.com]

...and haven't worn pants (in other words, worn only skirts) since 1995 or so...

Freedom wears no pants!

[jenwrites.livejournal.com]

All interesting stuff. I'll definitely be following this series.

On a semi-related tangent, did you see this Tuesday's episode of House with the Orthodox couple? The husband looked to be FFB and the wife was ba'alat teshuvah (six months earlier, she'd been a rock producer on heroin).

[ghilledhu.livejournal.com]

haven't worn pants (in other words, worn only skirts)

Well, thank goodness you specified that!

[elul-3.livejournal.com]

sometimes I shock them by proving them wrong.

Well, it would be silly to shock them by proving them right!

Re: Be sure not to fly that frumkeit in a storm.

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

Hooray pantsless freedom!!

And congrats on 24HPP going so well!

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

We don't watch House; I may track down the ep, though... it sounds interesting. Thanks for the heads-up!

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

mabfan felt I needed to be more specific than just "haven't worn pants."

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

True, though that does happen on occasion, as well.

Re: Be sure not to fly that frumkeit in a storm.

[gnomi.livejournal.com]

And I'm glad you picked up on the pun (though I should've expected you would).