Dear Big, Yellow Glowing Thing In the Sky

It's very nice to see you. I like it very much when you come to visit. Truly. However, do you think that, perhaps, you could come visiting slightly later? Blasting in through the shades at 5:30 AM and then making it bright enough that I can read without the electric lights? Totally uncool on a Monday morning. It leads to such things as my wanting to fall asleep in my lunch.

Thank you.

--The (very sleepy) Management

Another entry for "No, really. We talk like this."

(Scene: mabfan and gnomi are in the kitchen)

gnomi: If I had a million monkeys...

mabfan: If you had a million monkeys?

gnomi: I'd have Shakespeare!

mabfan: And if you had a million Shakespeares with a million typewriters, they'd throw feces at each other.

gnomi (laughing): And if I had a million Martin Luthers?

mabfan: They'd throw their theses at each other!